Mismatched Narcotics

Our social life is mediated, almost entirely, by drugs. Here, I do not mean various forms of cocaine, marijuana, or substances like ecstasy. I refer to alcohol and caffeine. We meet elderly relatives for tea, get together with friends for coffee, and try to get laid with alcohol. Maybe because of we are high, the occasions and the drugs seems to be mismatched. Elderly relatives are usually way down on the list of people we like to spend time with the most. The mild stimulation of tea seems to offer little help on the matter. When we are with friends, people whose company we enjoy the most, we should hardly need something dark and powerful to keep us going. Coffee seems to be a bit of overkill. And when we are trying to get laid, we had better had our eyes wide open to steer clear of coyotes. Alcohol famously does quite the opposite. We should instead binge drink to get over the boredom of relatives; have tea so as not to be distracted from stimulating conversation; and, down coffee to hone our shape hunter instincts and keep us up deep into the night. The lesson is that we should choose our drug with a clear head; because once the choice has been made, we are not in any shape to do it anymore.